OMG Bill O’Reilly and his man guests just vocally fapped all over because some (unnamed) study said conservative men are inherently stronger than nerdy, wimpy liberal men. Why? Liberals don’t believe in work or evil, therefore big strong conservative men with guns.
I have not snapped. Yet.
Today I have been forced to listen to Rush Limbaugh, watch Fox & Friends, and now: BILL O’REILLY.
Fox and Friends is actively telling people that because the evil IRS is in charge of Obamacare, that every conservative will be penalized in the health care arena. As in, the IRS will investigate them because they’re so important and fighting against evil satan Obama, then they won’t be allowed to go to the doctor ever again because satan Obama and his IRS henchmen will stop them, and...
"I WILL NOT BE SILENCED!!!"
Rush Limbaugh caller. Caller in to his national radio show. Live on the airwaves. In America. Strangely, no one stopped her.
Limbaugh constantly refers to the Obama presidency as “the regime.” If we’re a regime, where’s my fancy uniform? Something with rainbows and glitter made of Mitt’s tears, please.
Send ear plugs
Stuck in car with parents. Rush Limbaugh on. Help!
Angie's Genes Apologize to Every Man On Earth
Today in a statement released to the press, Angelina Jolie’s genes apologized to every man on the earth, nay, in the universe, for cursing her amazing rack. They said, “Biology, ya know, it’s a bitch. And so am I for depriving every male eyeball of the pleasure of feasting on Angie’s natural fun bags. At least until they got saggy or whatever.” Ms. Jolie...
Renowned author Dan Brown woke up in his luxurious four-poster bed in his...– Don’t make fun of renowed author Dan Brown (via scaredystark) This is a masterpiece. (via safno) Brilliant satire is brilliant.
glossylalia replied to your post: I think any of us who go see Star Trek Into… John Cho comes too!!! It’s a big tub. OK, I feel super ashamed to have left the beautiful, funny, intelligent Mr. Cho out of my pretend orgy. Damn straight. Bumblebee Cooterrot is not invited.
I think any of us who go see Star Trek Into Darkness and resist fapping in the movie theater deserve some sort of self-control award. Like Chris Pine, John Cho, and Zachary Quinto taking a bubble bath with us.
I can absolutely see the value of Fitocracy, but somehow the idea of all the people in my phone judging and one-upping my exercise is like having an app that stabs me in the brain when I lose a word puzzle game. Ha ha ha “‘Xyskfhjk’ isn’t a word, motherfucker, and also you’re a lazy asshole! SHALL I TELL EVERYONE? Y/Y?”
sleepandbooks answered your question: ? I remember a while ago that if you’re inserting a picture by url, remove the numbers before media.tumblr.com and that should fix it Nope, this image isn’t from Tumblr and it has no numbers. Thanks, though!
Can someone askbox me and explain how to post a picture in a reply without it being gray boxed? If I manipulate the HTML, stupid Tumblr just changes it again.
kelsium: I dunno, man. Sometimes I log onto Facebook and I get so angry because I have neither the time nor inclination to plant an indoor herb garden and cook shit with them and I just want everyone who is doing this to stop existing. Why can’t you just eat crap like everyone else.
The Met Ball taught me that the word "punk" means...
This new Man of Steel movie might be a lot cooler...
Paul Feig: Why Men Aren't Funny (Guest Column,...
(It’s satire, ahoy! Here.) Poor men. You hear them at the office, in restaurants, in bars, their brains filled with meaningless facts about sports, cars and electronics as they entertain friends with their endless jokes about genitalia and bathroom activities, not to mention their humorous accusations as to the sexual orientation of their conversation partners. They loudly amuse themselves...
Free Tee Friday!
threadless: Since you’re all pumped up from your midnight screening of Iron Man 3, we wanted to dedicate this Free Tee Friday to Mr. Tony Stark himself! Reblog this post by 10AM on May 13th for a chance to win any one of our Iron Man tees in your size! Which tee is your favorite?
blueandbluer asked: That's sticky rice, not rice krispies!
shewalkslikethunder: SPONGEBOB IS FOURTEEN YEARS OLD TODAAAAYYYYY??? He’s a SpongeMan now.
Don’t Stop Fleetwood Mac If you wake up...
blackgirlstalking: We’re spending next episode answering questions from our listeners, so if you’ve got some burning questions for us, send them our way. You can ask them via your medium of choice: Tumblr, Twitter, Facebook or by email. Visit blackgirlstalking.com for links. We’re recording the episode this weekend, so you have until Thursday night (May 2nd) to send us your questions!
The 2013 Summer Movie Preview →
richardlawson: The weather is warmer, the sun is out longer, and kids all across the nation are starting to get that wild look in their eyes. Which can only mean one thing: It’s almost summer! And what better way to spend the nicest days of the year than in a dark theater talking to no one. In that spirit, we bring you Richard Lawson’s in-depth look at 79 films worth getting excited about. ...